Yami No Cat?
by Manafique
Summary: Yugi finally gets a pet! He decides on a black cat and names it Yami after his other self. But what happens when both the feline and human Yami go toe to toe for Yugi's affections? Puzzleshipping, YYxY, AU where Yami has his own body. Contains yaoi/shounen ai/boy x boy. Don't like, don't read. Rated for occasional swearing.
1. Chapter 1

***gasps* My first story isn't angst-y! Wow! (Though the other one I publish today will be x3) Anyway, I got inspiration for this story when I looked at an image of Yugi cuddling a cat and Yami glaring at it in 'jealousy'. The moment I find it again, I'll make it the cover of the story. If I can't find it I'll just find a substitute.  
**

**Warning(s):**** Eh, later throughout the story there'll be some swearing and stuff, but obviously nothing much. Nothing that doesn't go over T. xD I might throw in a few sex jokes if I feel idiotic enough. Also, English ain't my native language. Japanese is, so be nice if you see grammar or spelling mistakes. I can't help it.  
**

**Pairing:** **Puzzleshipping, and mentions of various other pairings, though none will be heavily featured aside from Puzzleshipping, and even that won't be 'intensely shown' because this is a humor-fic and it isn't really supposed to be serious. At all. Period.  
**

**Summary:**** Yugi finally gets a pet! He decides on a black cat and names it Yami after his other self. But, what happens when both the feline and the human Yami go toe to toe for Yugi's affections? **

**Written by:** **Cloud Avalon.**

**Final notes:**** I really don't want any reviews whining about how Yami doesn't have a body and shit. There are thousands of fics that have Yami in his own body, so why are you hating on this one? ;-; Seriously though, no hate on that people. This is a humor fic. I don't wanna go through the pain of having to think up how Yami has his own body just for a fic that won't be more than 10 chapters most likely.**

**Enjoy my lovelies, enjoy!**

* * *

"You sure about a pet, Yugi?" Yami asked with hesitance as they exited the boy's 'house' (aka the Game Shop).

"Of course!" Yugi replied cheerily, his wide eyes shining with joy. "I've always wanted one, and Grandpa says that as long as I take care of it I can have it. Then he mumbled something about already me already having one, but I don't know what he means. I don't have a pet at the moment."

Yami coughed, assuming the old man was referring to him, but said nothing on the matter. Instead, he decided to ask what animal it was going to be and what Yugi planned to name it.

"Maybe a cat." The spiky-haired youth responded, shrugging. "They're nice."

"They remind me of Bakura." Yami grumbled under his breath, narrowing his eyes at the mere thought of the smirking thief. Even when he wasn't present, the very image of Bakura got on his nerves. He was that annoying!

"Why?" Yugi questioned, his tone hinting he was quite amused by the situation. Then he rolled his eyes and smiled. "What if I got a cat but named it Yami?"

"That would be..." Yami paused, wondering if this word should come from his mouth. It made him sound odd, after all. But, he was only around his hikari, so it didn't matter. "...interesting."

"Alright, 'Yami the cat' it is!" The younger replied cheerfully. "I'm sure he'll be the best pet ever!"

* * *

About an hour later, Yugi was reconsidering that. Maybe this cat wasn't so great. Sure, Yami the 'human being' was great, but the cat version was quite rowdy. He acted as if he was some king, and did something akin to a strut around the house. He even jumped on Yami's head and clung to it until Yugi pried him off.

"Maybe we should cage it." Yami said quietly, not wanting to upset the rather sensitive animal that was strutting a few feet away from them. It looked angry for no apparent reason, which was why he were avoiding it.

"It's a him, Yami, not an it." Yugi corrected as he tried to coax the cat into his arms, planning to lock him in his own room after he'd 'captured it in his grasp' before his grandfather got home.

"We need an exterminator." The Pharaoh remarked, eying the cat with narrowed eyes. The cat only glared back, as if saying, 'bring it you idiot. I'm not afraid of you or your little twin'.

"That's for bugs." Yugi replied with a sigh, just now remembering that his mou hitori no boku (1) was quite new to the modern world. "Besides, we wouldn't want to kill Yami, would we?"

"It depends on which Yami you're referring to."

Yugi eyed his other self for a good five minutes before turning back to the cat, which had miraculously not moved during that period of time. It was still starring at Yugi with its odd green eyes of doom that had a glimmer of blood lust (in Yami's opinion) in them.

So far, the only damage the cat had currently caused was knocking over a mere ten glasses (why they had ten glasses in a house that only held three people? Who knows) and gnawing on the leg of a table. All in all, Yugi and Yami concluded that he was a cross between Bakura and Marik (2).

Marik, because he liked licking stuff, and Bakura because he liked destroying stuff. For a split second he was like Ryou because he'd stop moving and look all innocent, but then he'd go Bakura or Marik in the next moment.

The cat was completely black, so it would look rather creepy in the dark with its glowing green eyes. Which, ironically, didn't really glow, they just...looked like it. But it was still freaky.

"Maybe we should feed it?" Yugi wondered aloud as he dodged one of the cat's claws. It was beginning to fall into a rage yet again, which was quite unfortunate as it did enough damage when it was 'happy'.

"Do you know anyone who's good with cats?" Yami asked with slight worry, beginning to wonder if the cat was going to be their demise.

"Ryou used to own one." Catching what Yami was silently wanting him to do, Yugi periodically left the room and went upstairs to his room to call Ryou on the phone.

A mere ten minutes later, the white haired boy was at the door with his usual smile.

"I didn't know you got a cat, Yugi!" Ryou exclaimed in surprise when he walked in, his smile widening at the black animal curled up on the floor. "He's so cute! What's his name?"

"Yami." Yugi replied proudly, ignoring the slight look he got from his other half. Yami (the human, not the cat. God knows what its thinking) wasn't exactly pleased with the name now he knew that the one who was dubbed with it aside from himself acted like such a demon.

"He has soft fur." Ryou announced as he petted the cat on the head, offering it a friendly smile. The animal glanced up at Ryou, as if silently asking, 'who the heck are you?' before laying its head back down.

"Wow!" Yugi walked over to Ryou and sat down next to him, studying his lazy looking cat. "He never let's me pet him!"

"Maybe he's just a bit scared and needs some love." The British boy offered, smiling when the cat finally stood up. "Look! He's already warming up to you!"

But, instead of going over to Yugi, the cat marched straight over to Yami like the proud pigeon-cat it was (it's a pigeon cat because it struts), and stared up at him. After a staring contest that lasted around five minutes ended, the cat finally did something.

He jumped into the air and scratched Yami's face!

It was an amazing feat, really. It jumped over 3 feet into the air! Quite amazing for a cat. But, the downside was that Yami now had three scratches across his cheek and was bleeding.

"Yami!" Yugi exclaimed, tsking and shaking his finger at the 'innocent' black cat, "Look what you've done!"

"I didn't do anything!" Yami protested angrily. Yugi shook his head and pointed at his new pet.

"No, this Yami."

"Yugi, your cat seems a little..." Ryou paused, trying to find an appropriate word to describe the cat's odd behavior. "..hostile."

"You don't say?" Yami grumbled under his breath, glaring at the cat before wincing in pain and walking to the kitchen to wipe his face off and put some sort of disinfectant on it.

"Maybe I should trade him for another cat..." Yugi sighed, placing a hand under his chin in thought as he watched 'Yami' chase after a random fly that had flown into its face. "This one seems to hate the real Yami."

"I think he just needs a little training." The albino giggled, adding, "Kind of like Bakura. He was mean at first, but now he's better."

Yugi raised an eyebrow. Images of a cat version of Bakura entered his mind. For some reason, the most disturbing part wasn't even the fact that Bakura was actually licking stuff from a dish full of milk.

But, what the heck. It was funny.

"Well, I have to go." Ryou announced, standing up and heading towards the door. As he turned the knob, he quickly added, "Just ask if you need any help!"

As Yugi yelled 'goodbye' after his friend's retreating form, he stood up and walked into the kitchen, wondering what was taking his yami so long. In turned out, Yami was still trying to tend to his own 'battle wounds', and Yami the cat was watching him with a smug expression.

Or so it seemed. It _was_ kind of smirking.

"Here, let me help." Yugi offered kindly, taking the wash cloth from Yami's hand and gently patting the cuts. Trying his best to ignore his other self's pained expression, he glanced over at his pet.

The cat was studying them with its head tilted to the side. Yugi smiled at it, wondering if it would calm the cat down. All it made the cat do was stare even harder at Yugi and begin licking its paw. Finally, it bowed its head and supposedly began taking a nap.

"What do you want for dinner, Yami?" Yugi asked as he finished applying the disinfectant. To his utter shock, both 'Yamis' looked up at him. It was amusing, yet scary. Mostly scary though.

"Spaghetti sounds good." The spiky-haired pharaoh replied, glaring at the cat next to him out of the corner of his eye. The cat only stared back at him for a couple of seconds before looking back at Yugi lazily.

"You think he wants spaghetti too?" Yugi joked, smiling down at the black feline, who just continued licking itself and never moved his eyes away from Yugi. It was kind of creepy, but Yugi was trying to be tolerant, so he let it slide.

Yami mumbled something about inserting poison into the food and walked away, glancing over his shoulder to make sure the cat didn't follow him. The black animal glanced over its own 'shoulder', but didn't move any of its leg muscles and stuck its tongue out slightly in a taunting manner.

All hell broke loose.

* * *

"Yami."

"What."

"Why did you mess with Yam- I mean, the cat?"

Yami said nothing and simply grumbled words Yugi was sure he didn't want to hear. Sighing, the short boy stood up and walked back into the kitchen to stir the spaghetti sauce. However, he didn't take his eyes off of both 'Yamis'. One was rolling on the ground, stretching, while the other was mumbling bitterly.

"Small, medium, or large Yami?" Yugi asked, referring to how much spaghetti the duelist wanted.

"Medium I suppose." He answered, sighing as the cat continued to roll in front of him.

You're probably wondering what happened earlier when all hell broke loose. Well, Yami dived for the cat and the sly feline moved out of the way, which resulted into Yami crashing into the cabinets behind it quite gracefully. The cat meowed in victory, but Yami tackled it and they began wrestling.

Surprisingly, the cat was quite good. It was a little frightening to know your cat was good at wrestling, but not all that bad. It could come in handy after all.

Maybe it could enter professional wrestling?

"Alright, here you go!" Yugi cheerfully walked back into the living room with a plate of spaghetti for Yami, but was shocked to see the cat sitting on his yami's lap and purring happily.

Yami looked confused, horrified, and downright angry, but he didn't dare move. If he did, the cat would wake up and probably cause havoc to once again break loose.

"Where's your grandpa, Yugi?" Yami asked as he watched his aibou disappear into the kitchen, only to come back with a pan of milk from the cat. It sniffed and stood up, running over to the milk and beginning to drink from the metal bowl.

"I believe he said he was out with friends." Yugi replied as he sat down on the couch near Yami, picking up his fork and twisting it into the noodles. "Why do you ask?"

"The cat is headed towards his room."

"Dang it!"

* * *

**(1) - This basically means "my other self" in Japanese and Yugi called Yami that before he called him...well...Yami. And for those who want to know what 'Aibou' means, it means "partner" in Japanese. ^.^ Where did I get these translations? I'm Japanese, le duh.  
**

**(2) - When I say Marik I'm referring to Yami Marik, but since 'yami' isn't part of his name I just said Marik. I call his other half (known as Marik Ishtar) Malik, as many other fans do, so...yeah. ^w^**

**Review if you want a second chapter, but be nice! This is just for fun, and it's just humor. No plot, and it isn't really supposed to make sense, so don't expect it to do so. Bye homies! **


	2. Chapter 2

**holymothersbunsshit**

**People actually like this! *gasps***

**You know that feeling when you write a story, and you think to yourself, "This is gonna be really popular"?**

**That's the exact opposite feeling I felt when publishing this. Yet, within a day, it gained several follows and favorites. YOU PEOPLE ARE JUST SO SWEET GAH I CAN'T -**

**Rainbowc - Thanks for reviewing sweetie! Appreciate that. Thank you. Yami accepts your condolences and promises he'll kick the other Yami's little black ass.**

**Thank you people so much! I can't believe I have only one chapter (well, two now) and so many people liked this story.. *begins sobbing with joy***

**(Btw, the swearing kicks in in this chapter. I warned you though, so don't be surprised! Also I changed my username, so I'm now Manafique instead of Cloud Avalon. Just so you know)  
**

**TALLY-HO!**

* * *

"Stop it!"

Yugi screamed, running as fast as he could after the retreating black mammal. Yami didn't move for a moment, confused by what was currently going on.

Okay, so, the cat was running away... yes ... it was definitely running away. But... from what?!

Or it could just be running. That too.

"Yami!" Yugi screeched from what Yami presumed to be his grandfather's room, "Help me!"

Immediately, the King of Games jumped off of the couch (1) and rushed to his hikari's aid. Well, somewhat. He tripped about half away and crashed into the nearest wall. If you listened closely, you could hear the cat snickering with demented glee.

"Yami, you're really clumsy."

Both Yami and Yugi gasped in shock.

The cat could speak?!

"Y-you can speak?!" Yugi asked, eyes wide with shock. The cat, who had been lazily licking his paw, turned his head and looked at Yugi with something akin to a glare.

"Yes, dumbass. I can talk." It answered indignantly, seemingly insulted by the question. "And, fyi, for someone who's the king of whatever, you're pretty dense."

"Take that back!" Yami threatened, glaring at the cat heatedly. It only returned his glare with a look of I-don't-give-two-shits.

"And for someone with that much hair, your head is sure small." The cat remarked, tilting his head and pretending to study the duelist in front of him. "It explains why you're so narrow-minded though."

Damn.

That cat was slayin'!

Well, not literally. If it were to be literal... well, that would be very bad and it was something Yugi's grandfather wouldn't be pleased about. Why? Oh no, not because his grandson would be dead.

But because it's so darn hard to get blood out of the carpet using only paper towels and water, plus some cheap ass soap!

Speaking of slaying, Yami was just about ready to do that to the cat. It was purring (something that annoyed him greatly) and stroking its fur, as if silently saying his 'hair' was better than Yami's.

The argument was invalid because it was fur, not hair, but the cat could care less.

"So, whaddya got to eat around here?" 'Yami' asked curiously, jumping onto Solomon Moto's most prized possessions:

A bunch of porn.

"Hey, what's in that box anyway?" Yugi asked curiously, studying the card board box that held something that would take his innocence and dash it to millions of pieces. "It looks like movies."

"Oh, they're movies alright." The cat said with a slightly excited tone, peering down beneath him to gaze at the beauty known as porn. Most of which, surprisingly, wasn't heterosexual. "The best movies I've ever seen."

"You've watched them?" Yami inquired dangerously, narrowing his eyes. How the heck did the cat watch the movies when he hadn't been in their house for more than 3 hours?

"Ohhhhh yeah." The cat replied, shaking its fur with... anticipation? "Was totally worth it. I really think you both should watch them. Oh, and make sure to have a drink handy. It has really 'spit-out-of-your-mouth' moments."

"Is it exciting?" asked Yugi, already becoming excited. These movies sounded great! Who knew his grandpa had such good taste! He was amazed! Well, somewhat. It was just queer that an old man liked good stuff.

No offense to the old men out there, though. You guys are probably really cool. Yugi's grandpa is the minority.

"Yup!" The cat was bouncing with anticipation, shaking its fur and then bouncing again! This was getting hype! "Sometimes I just want to moan with excitement, and I yell, 'more, more, more'!"

"That sounds interesting." Yami mumbled, wondering why the cat had selected the word moan. It was a bit odd for an action movie to make you moan -

"WAIT A MOMENT."

Yugi and 'Yami the cat' looked at Yami quizzically, wondering why the duelist was so riled up all of a sudden. He was sweating and looked somewhat flustered, which seemed to please the cat, but Yugi was still confused.

"WHAT TYPE OF ACTION IS GOING ON IN THIS 'MOVIE'?!" Yami demanded, trying to keep a blush from creeping its way onto his face. For some reason, the very thought of a cat enjoying porn was triggering.

It made him think of... unmentionable things that I shall not mention.

"Very..." The cat paused with a dramatic flair of his paw. "...intense action. Why?"

"Does the action contain blood?" Yugi asked timidly.

"Eh, it depends on which movie you watch." The cat responded after thinking the question over for a bit. "You see, sometimes the action gets _really _extreme, where there's biting and all of that."

"Wait, so you're saying it's like..." Yugi coughed, not knowing if he wanted to say this or not. "...Twilight?"

"Heck no!" The black feline sounded disgusted. "It's still a better love story than that!"

"Wait, can you describe your favorite one out of the whole lot of movies for me?" Yugi requested eagerly. He was hooked. This cat made these movies sound better than bread and butter!

"Sure." The cat jumped into the box and the sound of rummaging began. Minutes later, he popped up again and cleared his somewhat non-existent cat throat. "It's called, 'Final Release'."

Yami's eyes bulged, but Yugi looked pleased.

"What happens in it?"

"Two guys meet, see." The cat began, gesturing with its paws in wild manners. It looked freakish, sure, but it was also quite comical to say the least. "And one of them says to the other, 'hey, I like your booty' - "

"Okay, okay, okay!" Yami whistled, gripping Yugi's shoulders and steering him out the door. "That sounds like a wonderful movie, but tragedy has struck and we must go look for Yugi's grandpa. Alright?"

"No you aren't." The cat's emerald eyes narrowed dangerously. "You just want an excuse to go off and fuck, don't you?"

The silence that enveloped the room was so intense, a painting fell off of the wall.

Shit was going to go down.

* * *

**(1) Guess what happens when you're writing a chapter at nearly 7:00 in the morning? You say 'crotch' instead of 'couch'. So yes people, Yami jumped off of a crotch, not a couch. Who's crotch was it? I don't know. But he jumped off of it.  
**

**Also, I believe 'Yami the cat' and Judai/Jaden from Yu-Gi-Oh GX would make great friends. Well, Judai doesn't watch porn. OR DOES HE?!  
**

**Thanks to all of the people who faved or followed my story! I'm amazed it got such 'popularity' after such a short amount of time! And thank you, Rainbowc, for reviewing! Love your stories girl!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Ohmaigawsh.**

**This chapter is so late, it isn't even funny! I will update this story on Mondays only (my profile houses my updating schedule), but I meant to upload this earlier in the day! So sorry! But thank you, all of my reviewers, readers, followers, and favoriters! You guys are the best and keep me going!**

**I am not doing another disclaimer, so read this one, and read it good.**

_**I don't own anything aside from the cat who terrorizes Yami, and is obsessed with Yugi. Everyone else belongs to the creators of Yu-Gi-Oh. I own nothing.**_

**Ehehehehehe... keep in mind that the cat has a habit of talking about adult stuff, so if you're not down with that I don't recommend reading this fanfiction, okay?  
**

**Enjoy~**

* * *

Yami narrowed his eyes.

"Don't say such things in front of Yugi."

The cat sniffed haughtily and jumped off of his throne of porn, marching into the center of the room and eying Yami with intense loathing. He wasn't going to just let this prick leave with his true love!

OH NO SIR!

"If you don't want anything bad around Yugi, why do you 'grace' him with your presence?" The cat asked, obviously quite pleased with his comeback. But Yami wasn't going to let him get away, either.

"Because he needs protecting from idiots like you." The duelist shot back, the sudden urge to step on this thing's neck rising with every second that passed. He really, _really _hated this thing.

"Guys, please stop..." Yugi requested timidly. Previously, he'd been tempted to hide behind Yami. But the moment he saw his other self's eyes narrow with the anger of a bull seeing Taylor Swift's lips, he figured he should probably stay away.

"No, he'll mess with you." Both 'Yamis' said in unison, glaring each other after what had happened.

"Wait!" They both looked at Yugi with raised eyebrows (although the cat's wasn't quite so visible). Yugi glanced at the cat. "How can you talk so well?"

"I'll explain." The cat offered, once again leaping onto his throne of porn. He cleared his barely existent cat throat and began the tale of a life time. Well, the tale of a cat who lived in ancient Egypt.

"It was a hot day in Egypt..."

_"You really should get more sofas." I remarked, studying the bare floor of the palace. "My feet are exhausted!"  
_

_"Then go sit down." One of the priests -Seth, or whatever his name was- remarked irritably, sending me a rather menacing glare. Of course, I ignored him and continued being the beautiful beast that I am._

_"You know, Higeki -"_

_I hissed and glared up at Atem. "You know I hate being called that."_

"Wait, hold up!"

The black feline scowled. "Why'd you have to go and interrupt my story?"

"You knew Atem?" Yugi asked, eyes wide with shock. It was a little frightening, considering his eyes were already pretty wide, but those in the room let it slide because they were both hopelessly in love with him.

"Yup!" The animal replied boastfully, seemingly smirking. "We were best buds! I hung around his throne all of the time and followed him out into battle. So what I stood like, 10 miles away? I was still there. Anyway..."

_"Fine." The young prince sighed and crossed his arms. "Atemu. But don't you realize that that's my name with a 'u' on the end?"_

_"I just so happen to like your name." I scowled, insulted. "You should be honored, kid."_

_"I'm not a child - !"_

_"You're freaking 17." I yawned, stretching before adding, "Puberty isn't even over for you good yet, you haven't gotten laid, and you're pretty much innocent as a fluffy white cloud when it comes to sex."_

_The little pharaoh wannabe gasped with shock and glared at me, but I didn't miss the blush on his cheeks. Nope. It was blatantly obvious. In all honesty, I knew the kid probably just needed some dating advice._

_But, he'd already stalked off. Oops. Hopefully he won't go tell his dad. _

_Speaking of that guy, I have no idea what his name is. It starts with an 'A', and I'm pretty sure it ends with an 'N', but that's all I know, so I've settled for calling him 'An'. Kind of like 'Ann of Green Gables', but without the extra 'N', which I think is totally uncalled for._

"Your name is Atemu?!"

"Yup." The cat answered, once again with a prideful tone. "And boy am I proud of it. Please call me Atemu instead of Yami, Yugi. I don't wanna share names with that little -"

"Just continue." Yami snarled, absentmindedly searching the room for either a hammer, a mouse trap, or the Spice Girls movie to kill the cat with. All of them would work, so it didn't really matter.

"Fine, Mr Bossy Ass."

_"Ah."_

_I turned around, furious at the thought of someone interrupting the thoughts I'd just thought! How dare they! I was going to slit their throats, rip out their intestines, then step on them - !_

_Oh, hey! It's that Thief King guy! You know, the one with the tacky outfit and spiky white hair? Oh, and can you believe he actually tried to glare at me once? As if! Cats are the gods of Egypt!_

_Back to the dude._

_He was currently staring at me. Menacingly, might I add. But was I moved? Heck no. He could go suck a banana. I wasn't going to move and allow him access to my stash of Twix - I mean, the prince's bedroom! Who knows what he might do to the poor lad!  
_

_Well, actually, I have a pretty good idea._

_The Thief dude seems kind of gay. Okay, no, REALLY gay. I'm serious. I've seen the way he stares at Atem's hair -_

_I take that back. Even I stare at the kid's hair. It's really weird, but somehow attractive. Anyway._

_I've seen the way he stares at Atem's ass. HE OGLES THAT ASS!_

_"Stupid animal."_

_My head snapped up. Had the gay Thief of Whatever It Was just called ME stupid?! The one who ogles an ass that can barely be seen because its covered by some sort of weird dress?!_

_I wasn't going to stand for this. NO SIR!_

_"Says the gay hippie." I shot back, not even breaking a sweat. This guy couldn't even dream of taking me down. I'd watched way too many Jamie Chung - I mean, Bruce Lee movies to not know how to fight._

_I even know how to say the words!_

_HIJUNKIDICKCHICKHICK!_

_Awesome, right?_

_The Thief of Gay stared at me for a few moments, and I simply stared back. Finally, he snorted and brushed past me, ruffling my fur. Prick. I had the sudden urge to bite his flat little ass, but I held myself back._

_If anyone's flat ass was going to be bitten, it was that priests'. Pfft. It's not like he even has an ass to bite. That's how flat that thing is. No wonder Gay King of Thief doesn't like him! At least Atem has something down there!  
_

_Back to the priest. _

_HIS VERY PRESENCE IRKS ME! GAH!_

_Now, now. Don't judge me. There's someone in your life - you, yes you - who you hate simply because they exist. It's probably that teacher that acts like Santa Claus on crack but still manages to treat you like an anus._

_I take that back._

_If your gay, anuses are treated very well. _

_I probably should drop the topic of anuses, shouldn't I? Yeah, probably. Hold up. Let me go chase after the Thief of Gay and see what he's up too. Probably ogling Atem's ass._

"This isn't a very... " Yugi paused, trying to get rid of the heavy blush on his cheeks. After failing, he added, "...sensible story, Atemu."

"Life doesn't make sense, kid." Atemu replied, scratching the card board box some. "If it did, why does Solitaire exist? I swear, those little spiders are out to get me!"

"I think you might be thinking of the wrong game." Yugi informed the animal timidly, bowing his head to show that he wasn't trying to be rude or anything; he was just informing the cat.

"Don't correct me, boy." Atemu snarled. Then he giggled rather obnoxiously. "Just kidding! I'm the idiot who follows you around all day because I'm in love, but since I'm so ugly, I know that I'll be rejected! My name is Yamiiiiiiiii! Hehehehehheheehhehehehehehe!"

Yami cracked his knuckles.

_Oh no, he, didn't._

* * *

**Ironically, at the age of 8, I inwardly confirmed that Thief King Bakura was gay. Oddly enough, I ship Puzzleshipping, but I ship Atem with Seth, Mahaado, Thief King Bakura... weird, right? I suppose it's because I don't think of him as the same person as Yami as some people do, so I ship him randomly.  
**

**Anyway...**

**If this is confusing you, I'm flattered, because that's exactly what this fic is supposed to do. It kicks sense out of the window and replaces it with wtf. Nothing is supposed to be canonical or make sense, so don't review all harshly, kay? Kay.**

**AND OMFG THERE IS A JUNE BUG IN MY ROOM OH LORDY RA SAVE ME GOTTA DASH BYEEEEEEEEEE  
**


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